Cowboy & I had been chatting on the phone when he told me some things I did not need to know or hear, nor did I want to consider or discuss. And it led to him saying that he stayed as long as he did with the tube-tied, drug-using, courntey love-wanna-be because she was into kinky things. That was the draw.
I said that I thought he stayed with her because he was stoned & drunk out of his mind and didn't know better. And then I threw it out there that, what?, he didn't want to stay with me because I wasn't kinky? Define it. What does he think is in the realm of kinky? And how would he know what I was into since this is just never a topic that ever really came up? And since when was he?
I was beyond frustrated and he is so lucky that a continent and three times zones separate us.
Apparently, I do not look like the 'kinky' type. Good! But is that what draws a guy in? The lure of the kink? (Or is that kinky too?) Is that another reason why it is so hard to find a guy? Because they are loooking for something that I don't exude while walking down the street? Guys want a woman like that? Where other guys can tell, just by her walking apst them, that she's kinky?
This is all too weird for me. Maybe it's better that I am alone for now.
