Since Cowboy moved, he calls practically every night. I say practically because I sometimes call & there have been a few times where I was away that I couldn't really call due to schedules & privacy. Well, this week he hasn't called at all. He called Sunday night & that was it. I don't like to call him because of the time difference & he's at work. It's just easier for him to call me when he gets out & is on his way home. I've become used to the routine & liked it. It's familar & comforting.
So, since I hadn't heard from him, I called him on my way home from the Bon Jovi concert. We talked. It was okay. He seems to be getting more distant for some reason. But, he even said "Why are you calling me?" I said "Well, you haven't called me so I figured I'd see how you are & what's going on." He said "I think it's that you miss me. That's why you are calling."
When one becomes used to a pattern, one expects it to just continue. The pattern is breaking fast this week & I am not sure why. I asked him if it's that he's found someone to ask out. Nope. I asked is it that he's are going out with coworkers. He said no. So we talked a bit more and that was it. He said "I'll call you tomorrow. Have a good night." He didn't call. I tried calling him but it just kept ringing. I didn't leave a message.
It just seems that things in the program have changed & I have yet to receive the updated version.
Now, we aren't together, but we aren't really pursuing anything with anyone else either. I don't meet anyone. Period. I would like to, but I haven't. And he had so many good qualities that I don't want to meet anyone, but we don't seem to have a future as it is. So I need to find someone. And when I ask "is this the end?" I refer to the friendship we have had going for now. I know friendships change (apparently overnight in many cases) and I just want to know if that's what's happening now.
