I was chatting online last night with JW. He & I have this "fade in....fade out" thing going on forever. We talk and chat & hang out for a few weeks & then we do not speak at all for a few months. We're on the "hang out phase" again.
He recently went to Vegas.....oh so jealous(!)........and met a woman. Shocker. She is now the "love of his life". Even bigger shocker. He started our conversation with "Long distance relationships suck". I said "yes, they do. Why would you say that, though? Are you in one?" And so it began: he met a woman in Vegas who he has very strong feelings for. She lives in Detroit and he has been to visit her twice since meeting her six weeks ago. She is supposed to come here between now and the holidays and he is planning on going back there within the same period.
He wants to propse. At first, it may have been the "love" idea. But its not. He said he's tired of playing games and just wants to move on with his life. Don't we all? I suggested he see how it goes between now and the holidays. Nope. Not possible. I suggested he see how she likes Long Island. Nope. Why wait to find out? Just pop the question and take it from there. Now I have learned that waiting isn't necessarily the best thing in all situations, but when he is tethered to the Island and has no idea if she is willing to move "for love", then waiting may be good. Eight weeks won't hurt, will they?
That's when he proposed to me. ??? I said "You just professed your love for another woman. I can't be anybody's #2." He pointed out that he had not yet proposed, so technically I was not #2.......BIG stretch there, buddy. And that we get along, want the same tihngs, have fun together......yadda yadda yadda..........Not the way to win this woman over. PLUS I am not the "virtual marrying type". If someone is going to ask me such a question, do it to my face. Blah.
I'm all for getting on with life. He and I both want to be married (just I don't want to be married to him...or anyone that wants to do it just for the sake of saying they have a spouse) and we both want kids, but this is not the way. Even I know that. Yes, even in my state of depression, desperation, and despair, I know that much.
I just found the whole conversation odd, weird (but things with JW are usually), and a bit unsettling. I tried to play it off as a joke, but I think I may have hurt his feelings. I don't want to do that, but I don't want to get caught up in any weirdo fantasy that doesn't really have me as the starring role. Besides, if I wanted fantasy, Cowboy & I'd be "living on love" since he is broke & I work for the Patch.
