Last night Crak, KDP, Prettybird, the Blonde & I gathered at McCanns in Massapequa Park. This has become our new gatehring place as it is easy for us to all get to & its not completely on the other side of the island.
We were there for three hours & nothing happened. No guys to talk with, no good drinks, and no good stories to swap. I am in need of a good kiss and since the Marine & I have not been able to link up, I texted him to come out so we could kiss.
He said he was at a party but wanted me to go there to see him. I sent it back "nevermind" seeing as I was not about to go to an unknown location to hang with a guy I don't know well. Maybe I'm silly, but my safety is important to me.
At 12:30 he sent me a text asking if I changed my mind. I said no and that I had my fun & was headed home. He sent it back "Figures". So I sent it back "What does that mean?" wanting to know why he'd send that. I then fell asleep.
At 3 am I see that he sent "Does it matter?" So I said "Yeah, I'd like to know." At 3:23 am he sends "We should meet up." I replied with "So make plans. YOushould still respond." "Hun, i have no excuse for my shadiness...just a lot of bad s** at the same time" "So whylie? U hound me with texts for two weeks to go out. I try to set up stuff & youblow me off. Typical guy." He said "Yeah, typical guy then".
I sent "And you never answered the original text anyway. Don't worry hun (bc thats what he sends to me often & I asked him not to as we've gone out once) no big deal. have a good night." "K. good job being selfish. go 2 sleep now n thin abuot how guys suck." "Ur the one saying negative stuff towards me. Dont put this on me. I tried to make plans. I contacted youto try n go out. again, no big deal." "K. i have 2 friends die in one week. have some fu*** compassion"
Ummm.......this is where I got lost. He has said he was out at parties eachtime. He said he was with his Navy buddy who just got back from the service. Now its two people died?
"Not once did you call or text to say that. N every time I have contacted you your out & invite me so think of how it seems fromthis side of things." "Sorry I dont cry to someone I went out with once" "Didnt say to...I dont do drama. I'm saying be honest. N now u have tried to put this on me rather than explain what youmeant or what happened. Enough texting. Good night." "heh. K. ur obviously all about you" "Whatever youhave to tell yourself to not take responsibility"
This is when I shut my phone off. And yet I wake up to this: "Why should I feel responsible for coping with this sh**? Leave me alone."
Was planning on it. He doesn't get it. He sent me such probing....too intimate texts for two weeks of what am I looking for and the kind of guy he is & will be if we go out....and I'd say I just want to go out and have fun. Movies, dinner, dirnks, walking on the beach.....just to go out & have a good time. But one thing we talked about was communicating & here he didn't. He's texted me a few times at 12 in the morning to come hangout & I never respond because its too weird. I don't just get up & go to hang with a guy at midnight when I don't know him well. It was becoming clear to me taht I was good to contact at odd hours of the night to hang out but that would be it. So I thought I'd use him in the way he wanted to use me. And this is what it broke into. Him saying he's at parties then its he had two friends die & I have no compassion.
Whatever.
